All I want for X-mas is a new finger

It's Christmas time, where people forget how to drive, school gets canceled for a month when it sleets, and fans don't get what they want until the day before x-mas. People understand how frustrating it is to get something too late, when you know it could have solved the source of the problem from the beginning. Sort of like Tiger Woods's plastic addiction. If he was not so addicted to barbie dolls and stopped his addiction with the first silicon toy, he might still be Ken with the red Convertible and the sexy pink house but now he is Ben, the guy with a pinto and a card board box, but at least his box still has a Nike logo. So all and all, we all know the true meaning of Christmas, receiving is better than giving. I mean, lying is better than telling the truth. No, I mean giving is better than receiving. Everyone knows that it is a load of crap, but even though you like receiving gifts than buying someone a gift, you will always be left with a nice little smile. What are some things that put a smile on our faces this season for the panthers?

1) Trying to find a fat guy in Charlotte to replace Kemoeatu. Guess we looked every where except K and W cafeteria, CiCi's Pizza and any KFC Fast food chain. We finally found a 73 year old man named Hollis Thomas that we had to tie up to Julius to help him get a sack this year, kind of like the spoof movie (Not another teen movie), when they tied up Reggie Ray to two other defensive players after he was in a coma from all the Dan Morgan Concussions he kept taking to the face.

2) Beason getting his beast on. It's not enough that Jon Beason breaks people faces for a living, he has to do it for free. We should fine him for not doing that on the field. I WANT TO WATCH! It's not fair that us fans didn't get to see the fight. I say we have a rematch and put it on Paperview and the winner gets a paid vacation to the cheapest strip joint Charlotte has to offer, but the catch is, the strippers have to wear helmets just in case the powder sugar gets to him again. Nothing worse than a sugar rush, huh?

3) Seeing all those wonderful picked balls by our hero, Jake Gohomme. Interception #1, Interception #2, Interception, #3, Interception #4, Interception #5. You ask, is that through out the season. NAH, it was one game and he played that bad multiple times this year. What makes me smile about this, is that for the past three games, Moore has thrown 1 interception. If he keeps these stats up through out this season and for next, Moore will acummulate the amount of interceptions Jake threw in one game. Now seeing Jake with a paper cut on his finger, I mean a broken finger, makes me happy to watch a Panthers game without expecting the worst but now expecting the best to come.

So, Merry Christmas to everyone that didn't give up hope and Merry Christmas to Jake (the only chance we have to win) Delhomme to put a smile on our faces. And P.S. Bahumbug to Fox.